by Adam Jones 

Pastor Hall went Old Testament on us this morning and selected Jeremiah from the liturgy. Jeremiah's not exactly the cheeriest guy in the Bible (think Bob Stoops after his team makes a crucial special teams mistake). Matter of fact he's (Jeremiah, not Bob Stoops) where we get the English term "jeremiad," which is what Mike Gundy demonstrated last week. And you just thought he was a psychopath.

For some reason, Jeremiah gets all optimistic on us in Chapter 32. The Jews are really up against it: Jeremiah under house arrest, Jerusalem under siege to the Babylonians, generations of exile on the horizon before the Israelites return, the Romans take over and we start the whole process over again. In the middle of all this, Jeremiah buys some land, right in the middle of the Babylonian army's path. This would be akin to investing in Parisian sidewalk cafes about the time the Blitzkrieg is rolling through Belgium. But God told him to do it and Jeremiah complied. Why? Because God also told him that there would come a time when God's people would again build houses and till fields and grow vineyards in this land.

That's the Hebrew translation. In modern day football speak, God was telling Jeremiah: "You just gotta keep playin' ‘em, my boy."

Stanford 24, The University of Southern California 23

Now that's an upset. Since this seems to be the year for them in college football, let's try a little perspective, shall we?

In 2003, the heretofore biggest upset in the BCS era, Virginia Tech lost to Temple by exactly the same score. Temple was plus 26 and deserved every last point the betting line gave them.

Earlier this month, when a terrible Syracuse team took out Louisville, the line was 38.

If you are curious, there was no line on Michigan versus Appalachian State. However, there is no way App State, the defending I-AA national champs, would have been 38-point dogs, even in Ann Arbor.

This brings us to last night. Stanford, thrashed by every decent Pac Ten team they had come up against and playing with a second-string quarterback making his first start, was a 41-point underdog to USC. Tavita Pritchard may not be John Elway, but it is pretty likely the kid won't have to buy many beers in Palo Alto for a long time. He was nails down the stretch, floating a perfect ten-yard TD to Mark Bradford on fourth and goal with under a minute to play. The game ended with a John David Booty interception, his fourth of the night. USC hadn't lost at home in 35 games, since September 29, 2001. Who beat them that day? Stanford. The Cardinal have labored in Babylon for a long time.

I guess you might want to know about the game in Baton Rouge, huh? LSU and Florida played a dandy, good enough to deserve the lead in any week where a 41-point underdog didn't bring down the Juggernaut. The Tigers went five-for-five on fourth downs, coming back from a ten-point fourth-quarter deficit and sending the Gators home 28-24 losers.

Wisconsin's luck, and the Badgers' 14-game winning streak, came to an end in a 31-26 loss to Illinois. This was certainly not an upset, not anymore than Maryland over Rutgers, Kansas State over Texas, or South Florida over anyone is an upset. The better team prevailed; for that matter the Illini were actually favored. Anyone who took the points as a value pick counting on Bret Bielema out-coaching Ron Zook failed to understand exactly how talented Illinois is. As Dan Jenkins says: "Smart guys have been robbing dumb guys for years."

The Texas/Oklahoma game was a typical slugfest. The Sooners pulled it out 28-21, but Texas showed a few things unseen this year: confidence, desire, execution. The Texas malaise may just be symptoms of a rebuilding year. Oklahoma, on the other hand, is solid and the class of (yet another) down year in the Big 12.

There is hope for Missouri. The Tigers scored on their first possession and never looked back, routing Nebraska 41-6. I fully expected Bill Callahan to field the best team of his tenure at Nebraska this year. Instead, we may be watching his worst. How in God's name (the God of the Israelites, not Bob Stoops) can Nebraska be this bad?

In other Big 12 news, the team coached by the guy who sold confidential information over e-mail to major boosters beat the team coached by the bizarre gel-headed immature screaming maniac, 24-23.

South Carolina, behind the continuing tradition of Steve Spurrier, defensive genius, largely controlled Andre Woodson and went home 38-23 winners over JTT supersecret darkhorse Kentucky. The Wildcats get LSU next Saturday. Let me know how that works out for you, big blue.

Ohio State crushed Purdue in what was supposed to be a great Big Ten match-up. Truth is Purdue was never in it. 23-7 Buckeyes, and the seven for Purdue put the "G" in garbage time. An OSU fan e-mailed me this week and asked what was reasonable to hope for from the Buckeyes. I replied a Big Ten title and a BCS game. How about we change that to winning the national title? There is no guarantee that LSU has the nation's best defense, it may reside in Columbus.

South Florida, not really enjoying being the favorite and turning the ball over four times, survived Florida Atlantic 35-23. Howard Schnellenberger basically invented D-I football at Florida Atlantic. He believed that a team outside of the Floridian Big Three could actually become a power in college football because of the recruiting advantages the location provides. I thought this was nuts, and even wrote about it at the time. I was wrong, Schnelly was right. Of course, to be fair, Schnellenberger probably assumed it would be his team, not South Florida, to ascend to such heights.

Boston College, after looking lackluster against UMass last week, destroyed Bowling Green this week, 55-24. The Jesuits visit the Brothers of the Holy Cross next week on NBC.

Speaking of Notre Dame, the Irish whipped the mentally fragile UCLA Bruins 20-6 in Pasadena to win their first game of the season. UCLA was down to their third-string QB and it showed. Nevertheless, the Bruins should not have lost this one.

Auburn has apparently gotten their groove back, crushing Vandy 35-7.

...and so has Tennessee. The Volunteers ripped visiting Georgia 35-14, and it wasn't that close. How in the Devil (Satan, not Bob Stoops) can Georgia be so unprepared to play at Neyland? Mark Richt had never lost at Tennessee until Saturday.

Virginia Tech decided to simply shelve the offense, since it wasn't working anyway, and beat the living crap out of Clemson on defense and special teams, returning a kick, punt and interception for a score while holding the Clemson tailback duo to roughly one yard in a 31-8 first half. Total domination by the resurgent Hokies, who then coasted home 41-23. Clemson fading into the woodwork...what do they say about those who fail to study history?

West Virginia obliterated Syracuse 55-14, but Pat White hurt himself yet again. Bummer.

Remember Butch Davis? Nawth Klina 33, Miami 27.

Arizona State has yet to fold and we are now into October. The Sun Devils gutted out a 23-20 decision over Wazzu. That's not easy, especially for a team with a history of inopportune flops like Arizona State's.

Hawaii played the late game against Utah State and I could care less about the outcome. If you believe me to be a big state school-biased jackass with no appreciation for the little guys, please press one at the tone.

Finally, two Cinderella stories avoided the pumpkin. For the second year in a row Cincinnati defeated Rutgers, 28-23, keeping the Bearcats ranked and undefeated. Meanwhile, in the Sunflower State, Kansas turned back Kansas State, 30-24, keeping the Jayhawks undefeated and likely ranked by the time Colorado comes to Lawrence next weekend.

Impressive Showing of the Week: Stanford

1. LSU: The Tigers are not out of the woods yet and beating Kentucky will not be an easy task...

2. LSU: ...that said LSU looks like the class of the country.  

 

3. Ohio State: Year-in and year-out, the Buckeyes may be the best-coached team in the nation. Combine that with a killer defense and a giant Germanic QB who manages the game well behind a very good line and, especially in a strange year like this, it is a pretty good recipe to end up on top.

4. California: Yes, the Bears are very good. I would still barely take them on a neutral site against USC.

5. South Florida: Ranking them third last week was simply over-exuberance on my part. Nevertheless, these guys can play with anyone.

6. Boston College: This ranking is pretty tentative. While BC impressed with a thrashing of Georgia Tech, that signature win looks worse and worse all the time. The Yellow Jackets dropped to 3-3 with a loss to Maryland. Boston College needs to close strong: Va Tech, FSU, Maryland, Clemson, Miami comprises the end game.

7. South Carolina: The Gamecocks have proven that they are not in LSU's league. So what? They've certainly handled everyone else.

8. Oklahoma: The Sooner secondary is overrated, but there's not much else wrong with them. They are kicking themselves over letting Colorado get off the mat.

9. USC: Maybe the Trojans should be bounced right out of the top ten. Then again, they outgained Stanford 459-235. It's a bit flukish. Someone has got to get between J.D. Booty's ears and straighten the kid out. He's killing them.

10. Missouri or Arizona State: Two teams with a history of inexplicable collapse, but they are both unscathed this far and have been impressive along the way. Missouri's opening win over Illinois is looking better and better.

Want to see something interesting? Check out the last fifth of the AP poll this week. Five of the six teams ranked between 19-25 lost this week. Who knows who will crack the lineup now?

Special thanks to reader M.A. from Austin who this week provided me with a perfect set of burnt-orange plastic Solo cups. I will break no more wine glasses before their time.

 

Copyright 2007 Adam Jones

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